Occasions
by The Frisky Firelily
Summary: The crew of Serenity isn't recovering well after the horrors of Miranda, so Kaylee thinks of a plan. A look at various occasions in the year post-BDM. Slightly-AU because I wanted the family whole. I warn you now, tis fluffy.
1. Recovery

**TITLE:** Occasions

**DISCLAIMER**: I own nothing.

**A/N:** A trip through the year after the BDM, a look at those special occasions in the life of the crew. I have decided that Book and Wash will be alive in this fic – obviously AU, so please don't bother informing me they died in the movie, I know they did! We'll roll with the idea that Book managed to bring down his attackers before they struck the killing blow, and that Wash was pulled out of the way of the Reaver's battering ram. All good? Yes? Let's roll!

**Occasions**

It had been about a month after Miranda, after the nightmare that was the Reaver battle and Mr. Universes' moon. They'd made it through, barely, and they were all now recovered, at least in the physical sense. On the surface their bodies were working fine, but underneath was another story. Nobody had come out of that battle unscathed.

Zoe still woke in the middle of the night, envisioning what could have happened to Wash if the seat hadn't given out on impact, visions of him immobile and pale, anchored to the chair by the massive hunk of wood haunted her dreams. Her husband fared no better, his near death experience shaking away the last of his hesitations about starting a family, his mind was made up. Which would have been a positive thing if the experience hadn't terrified Zoe in a way she'd never known before, causing her to reconsider whether she was really able to be a mother, to go through that fear of losing someone twofold. They weren't fighting, per se, but the tension between the two was thick enough to cut with a knife.

Mal was faring little better. Although the Alliance had gone into damage control, immediately issuing statements as to "rogue Alliance scientists", shucking any semblance of responsibility and even providing the crew with medical attention, he couldn't shake his concerns for retaliation. It didn't help that he had no clue as to what was going on with Inara, who had become withdrawn.

The Companion was shaken to her very core, everything she had believed about the Alliance had come crumbling down, and the days she had spent sitting by a comatose Mal had taken their toll on her psyche. She would become flustered in his presence, her usual calm and control apparently evaporating at the sight of his injured form. She didn't know her position on the ship, didn't know what she was to do now, and was too petrified of rejection or ridicule to even contemplate speaking to Mal about it.

Book himself was also shaken, desperately trying to hold on to his beliefs whilst at the same time recognising that theft and violence do not necessarily equate to evil. He struggled to come to terms with his place in the crew now, struggled to reconcile the holy man and the man who had shot down an Alliance cruiser after it had slain his people. He wasn't sure what he would be doing now, but knew there was nowhere else he could go, not with his flock in such turmoil.

Simon was doing alright, tentatively moving through the first steps of his relationship with Kaylee, working hard to look after the physical health of the crew and keep his foot out of his mouth. He'd been exhausted after Miranda, the stomach wound taking a while to heal, and his crew refusing any medical treatment that he hadn't approved making it difficult to rest. Still he'd felt an odd sense of pleasure at their loyalty, at their maintenance that only he could be trusted with their help. Zoe had actually drawn her Mare's Leg with a shaking hand the first time someone had tried to touch Wash without Simon in the room. When Simon wasn't available, they looked to River.

She was the only one to come out completely unscathed from the hell that was Miranda; their youngest crew member had haunted the hospital like a ghost. Staff had complained about her, they had no idea if she slept, and from the looks of her malnourished frame she wasn't eating enough, but they had figured out quickly just to leave her be. She would wander from room to room, sometimes talking to Zoe and Wash, sometimes letting Book read to her from his library of books, sometimes allowing Kaylee or Inara to brush her hair. She would sit silently in Mal's room, even once he'd woken up, but the staff could see that the Captain was comforted by her presence. As he healed he would start telling her stories of adventures from before, her large brown eyes knowing the endings but wanting to hear them anyway.

The crew had found fast comfort in these visits, partly because she always happened to be in the room when a nurse or doctor attempted to treat them. Occasionally she would grab their wrist mid-action.

"Brother knows best." Invariably they would attempt to do what they had planned, but quickly learned that those thin fingers held them in a vice-like grip, and no crew member would allow them to touch or treat until Simon had been consulted. Without fail his orders would differ to what the staff had planned to do, and the prevention of their treatment had actually shaved days off everybody's healing.

Jayne would have been recovering just fine if it hadn't been for the crazy-girl's visits. Physically it was just a gunshot wound that kept him bedridden, and despite his hatred for the forced inactivity, he at least knew it wouldn't be required for long. The first time Crazy had come in she'd obviously just showered, her hair wet and tangled, and her skin dewy from the moisture. The Reaver blood she'd been covered in must have turned the water red, he'd thought to himself. It would have been fine except for the fact that she'd changed into a plain white t-shirt that must have been six sizes too big for her. The moisture from her still damp body made the baggy fabric cling to her thin form in all sorts of distracting ways, and he'd growled at her to stay out of his wardrobe and leave him alone.

She'd just looked at him with those big, calm eyes, and sat silently in the chair next to his bed. When she drew her lean legs up to her chest the t-shirt had slipped towards her hips, a pair a small black shorts her only adornment other than those oversized combat boots. He'd growled at her again, and she'd simply stared at him evenly until he gave up and succumbed to sleep. He'd dreamed of tiny dancing girls on his shoulders, and had woken up confused and frustrated. When he woke she was gone, but the chair she'd been sitting in was still warm, as if she'd just left. Not that he'd felt it or anything.

She'd returned the next day, this time in his massive green jacket, and he'd growled again, although it was half hearted. She'd sat with him for an hour, and when she'd left he felt a strange sense of loss. Her visits were regular; as they were for all the crew, but he'd never found someone who didn't speak to be so damn distracting. He had longed for the day when he could get up, get away from her, and hide from those otherworldly eyes.

Once they'd gotten back on the ship he'd become withdrawn, avoiding her, speaking to the rest of the crew in short, clipped sentences. His days consisted of working out, eating, and staying in his bunk. His nights were filled with dreams of slick skin and supple curves, and more than once he woke up in a cold sweat, his sheets stained with the results of these dreams.

River herself was simply floating through the ship, sitting quietly with whoever she found that day, allowing their distraction and tension to wash over her. When Simon had asked what she was doing one day, she had simply replied that she was waiting. When he asked what for she had smiled softly to herself.

"For the sunshine to return."

* * *

With the crew so mentally scarred and the tension between people so heavy it was only a matter of time before something happened. That something was Kaylee. Better than anyone, Kaylee had bounced right back, seeing Miranda for what it was. A horrible occurrence that they had survived together, as a family, something that should have been celebrated as a relief and a gift. The family she loved so much was now a quiet and tense group of people barely surviving each day. Dinners were not the rowdy affair that they once were, and people avoided each other, making the boat feel cold and silent. Something had to be done.

She thought hard about what to do, not even speaking to Simon about her concerns, just knowing that the crew couldn't continue like this. It was when she located River that the idea solidified. The younger girl had been lying on the cold catwalk in the cargo bay, her large pink sweater and black shorts making her look even smaller than usual. She'd waited until Kaylee sat down next to her, basking in the glow of acceptance radiating off the other girl. She'd sat up, turning away from the object of her focus, and sat across from the mechanic.

"Seasons come and go, things change. Tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow, creeps along this petty pace from day to day." Kaylee had just nodded, now used to the Reader's strange way of speaking, knowing she was recognising the same problem amongst the crew.

"So what should I do?"

River had smiled. "Bring family together. Single focus, focus of celebration. All Hallow's Eve draws near, an affirmation of joy for all good children." Kaylee smiled, glad she'd come to River to check her plans likelihood of success. She had figured out quickly that checking ideas with River was a good way of planning ahead, and the younger girl hadn't disappointed. She'd nodded and left to prepare her plan of attack.

River smiled to herself, lying back down on the catwalk, once again focussing on the man below. He was sweating, the preacher standing by to spot him, and she could feel the angry flow of his thoughts. She hummed softly to herself, a tune about butterflies and samurais filling her head.

Kaylee attacked at dinner. This was the only way she could think of to bring everybody together, an occasion, a chance to celebrate and think of something other than their own problems. River had obviously agreed, and she was now looking forward to springing things on everyone.

The quiet table filled her with sadness, but she pushed it aside, breaking the silence as she detailed her intentions. The silence grew heavier as everybody stared at her, open mouthed, while only River nodded approvingly. Mal was the first to recover.

"You wanna have a Halloween party?"

**A/N:** A slow start I know, but I didn't just want to jump in into things. I figure nobody would come away from Miranda without being thoroughly shaken, and that long term recovery would require a spark, something to start the process. Please review :)


	2. Halloween

**TITLE:** Halloween

**DISCLAIMER:** Ain't mine!

**A/N:** How are we travelling? There's something in here that some people might find a tad creepy…but River is 18 now, so try to roll with it!

**Halloween**

This was Kaylee's fault. The more he thought about it, the more he was happy placing the blame right on the shoulders of the happy little mechanic. Whilst he was willing to admit that maybe her intentions hadn't been to cause him quite this level of misery, it was still her genius plan that had started this whole thing.

They'd sat staring at her after she told them they were having a Halloween party, all far too entrenched in their own post-Miranda issues to wrap their minds around something so childish. But her normally warm eyes had been set firmly, her expression brooking no dissent, and even Mal hadn't been able to formulate an appropriate argument against it. Jobs had been handed out rapidly, people just nodding rather than commenting.

Inara and Book were assigned cooking duty first, and the Companion felt oddly warm at being included in the crew activities. Her confusion as to her place in the crew was somewhat soothed by the issuing of instructions, and she made a note to herself that perhaps she would have to establish her own place rather than being asked to do so. She found the idea of cooking, something so simple and menial, oddly appealing. Especially if it meant Simon were banned from the kitchen.

The doctor, Jayne and Mal were put on alcohol procurement, a task so simple that none could argue against it. Zoe and Wash were instructed to decorate, and any objections from the couple were silenced at a fierce look from Kaylee. The girl was on a mission. She asked River to find some music for them, and the younger girl nodded solemnly, taking her task seriously. Kaylee herself would be organising the whole thing, and nobody could voice an objection in the face of her enthusiasm.

They'd found the concept of a shared mission surprisingly soothing, redirecting their previously melancholy focus to basic tasks helping to abate the tension that had fallen over them. By the time the day had arrived everyone had put in a surprising amount of effort. The kitchen was producing the most incredible smells, a product of Inara's apparent skill with cooking and Book's abundance of herbs and contacts in local markets.

Mal, Jayne and Simon had managed to procure a vast quantity of alcohol, although none of the three would admit to just how they'd managed to get their hands on so much. Kaylee suspected that a game of cards and some creative cheating had assisted their efforts, but kept her mouth shut in light of seeing the three getting along amiably. They'd returned to the ship grinning, arms full of their liquid bounty, stumbling a little after "sampling" the produce.

River had somehow obtained some ancient songs from earth that was, and the ship was now filled with bass and throaty vocals, songs about mobscenes, Alabama and being thunderstruck revving people up. Zoe and Wash had managed to hang faux spider webs, put candles all throughout the bay, and even used a couple of hollowed out pumpkins from the kitchen to make Jack-o-Lanterns. With the bay lights dimmed it looked extremely impressive.

The costumes had caused some concern, Kaylee had demanded that everyone participate fully, and each crew member found themselves having to think overly hard on their wardrobe. Mal and Jayne had entered the cargo bay early, eager to take advantage of the alcohol available. They'd laughed when Simon had already been down there, grinning at his comrades while passing them glasses of scotch. Mal had gestured to Simon's costume.

"Ain't ya 'sposed to dress up as something you ain't?" Simon had grinned widely, looking down at his white coat, stethoscope and neatly polished shoes. "I did. Normally I run an insane asylum, but tonight I'm dressed as a Core doctor."

Jayne had burst out laughing at this, taking a long slug of his scotch. Mal was dressed as an Alliance soldier, although Jayne suspected he'd had more fun in the fight he'd started to steal the uniform than in actually dressing in it. Simon gestured at Jayne's cargo pants, lewd t-shirt, and long brown jacket.

"Did you dress up at all?" Jayne smirked, "Course I did…I'm Mal." His Captain had glared but he and Simon had laughed even harder. A couple of hours in and Jayne was almost ready to admit this had been a good idea. He was on his way to firmly hammered, and Kaylee (dressed in one of Inara's harem outfits that had made Simon's eyes bug out of his head) had even come up with some funny drinking games. The food had been incredible, Inara and Book managing to turn fresh produce into deliciously creepy eyeballs, brains and a large bowl of punch that was blood red.

Inara was dressed in a pair of leather pants and a vest borrowed from Zoe, and Jayne had laughed as Mal had nearly choked on his drink. "An' jus' what're you 'sposed ta be?" Inara had smiled regally, having found her calm and control return through Kaylee's little idea, and raised one eyebrow.

"I'm a petty thief, of course." Mal had smiled and handed her a drink, his eyes following the tight vest down her chest and stomach. Wash was dressed in a brilliantly cut black suit ("Wash, Hoban Wash.") and Book had found some Shepherds robes and a staff to don ("I thought it was appropriate, given this little flock.") Zoe had been the biggest surprise; the usually stoic first mate looked sewn into a black cat suit and thigh high boots, her husband unable to take his eyes off his slinky wife. Whenever she was asked about her outfit she just shook her head, sharing a private smile with Wash.

Everybody was relaxed and enjoying themselves. Everyone except Jayne. There was alcohol, food, and his female crewmates were dressed in outfits that should have made him want to run to his bunk. And yet here he was, watching everybody laugh and play games and an inebriated Mal attempting to dance with the amused Inara, sitting on a crate in the corner. It was all Kaylee's fault.

It was the mechanic's idea to wear costumes, and River, like everyone else, had complied. She could've gone for anything but that, could've dressed in any way but she chose that gorram outfit. It was bad enough he'd taken to thinking on her way too hard, bad enough he was exhausted most of the time from lack of sleep due to those dreams, bad enough he had to see her every day. But now, after seeing her in that?

He'd heard Simon talking to Book, saying it was just an old school outfit she'd had from before the Academy. But what would have looked innocent on a 14 year old girl was utterly devastating on an 18 year old woman. The tight white shirt strained against her chest, accentuating her small waist and flat stomach. A red tie around her neck filled his head with ideas he'd definitely get spaced for. The plaid tartan skirt, probably once demure and innocent looking, was now a deadly weapon, short enough to make his mouth water, kicking up when she walked. She still wore her combat boots but underneath them were long white socks that came up mid-thigh, highlighting her lean legs. Her skin had glowed in the candlelight, her hair radiant and loose.

So now here he was, hiding in the corner, desperately trying to avoid looking at the girl in that outfit. He'd never felt like a filthy old man before (hell at 32 he hadn't thought he qualified yet) but the things he wanted to do to that girl. When she'd entered the cargo bay looking like that he'd noted Mal's raised eyebrows, Simon's confused look and Wash's amusement. He'd hoped she'd be sent back to change, preferably into something baggy that hid her figure. Instead they'd shrugged, letting her be a gorram adult, and the women had exchanged secretive smiles.

He was drinking heavily, leaning against the wall and closing his eyes, wondering he could make an escape but having seen Kaylee's warning glare he decided such an action wouldn't be wise. As long as he avoided looking directly at River, maybe he'd be alright. He opened his eyes and nearly fell off the crate. Ruttin' Crazy girl was standing right in front of him, arms behind her back, an action that pushed her chest forward. He desperately tried to focus on her face, but her huge eyes were rimmed with black kohl, looking smoky and alluring, and her pink lips had some kind of shiny gloss on them. Chocolate curls tumbled around her shoulders, and he struggled to control his breathing.

"Sunshine wants you to come and play." He tried to focus on her words as her mouth moved, shaking his head to clear to fog that was building up. He jerked his hand back as she placed a delicate touch against it.

"Come now, family time." She took his large hand in her own small one, a surprisingly strong grip pulling him forward. He trailed behind her, allowing her to pull him along, trying to keep his eyes off her skirt clad behind. The rest of the crew was assembled in a semi-circle around Zoe, and he stayed behind River, hoping to hide his reaction to the brief physical contact. He definitely didn't close his eyes and breathe in deeply, definitely didn't smell the scent of apples and cinnamon coming from her hair. Kaylee noticed him.

"Oh good, we're all here. Ok, so since Zoe's bein' so damn shifty, I figured we'd play a game to guess her costume. Winner doesn't have ta do chores for a week. If nobody guesses then Zoe gets ta claim the prize." The rest of the crew looked eager to avoid their chores, and Zoe's private smile said she was confident that she'd be winning. The first mate was keeping her mind carefully blank, so even River wouldn't be able to See anything.

Mal suggested whore, earning him a punch from Inara, who suggested cat burglar to no success. Wash had been excluded early on, being as he was her husband and likely to cheat. Book guessed at liquorice stick, which earned a laugh from the rest of the crew. Simon couldn't think of anything, and Kaylee patted his arm gently, asking if Zoe was just a black line. Zoe, grinning at their guesses, shook her head.

Jayne half-heartedly suggested stripper, too distracted by his close proximity to River to think of anything else. That earned him an elbow from Kaylee, and another head shake form Zoe. River was staring at Zoe with those creepifying eyes of hers, and Jayne fought the urge to look down her shirt. Girl was so damn short it was hard not to. Finally she stepped forward.

"Last looks, last fitting. Mother." The entire crew stared at Zoe, trying to wrap their heads around her words. Zoe smiled wider, nodding her head.

"She's right. I just wanted to wear this while I still fit into it." At their dumbfounded look she sighed. "I'm pregnant." There was a brief pause, followed by a cacophony of cheers, shouts, denials and congratulations. Wash was smiling proudly, one arm around his wife, the other accepting handshakes and hugs from various crewmen. Even Jayne was distracted enough by Mal's angry questioning of the married couple that he didn't noticed River slip to the back of the group. When he was done congratulating them, he turned, only to find her sitting on the crate he'd been using before, leaning forward, legs crossed and swinging aimlessly. She was smiling, and he struggled to control his almost violently lustful reaction to that strange mix of innocence and otherworldly beauty.

He wondered when he'd started saying "otherworldly"…or when he'd started thinking she was a beauty. She looked at him, still smiling.

"Come as you aren't night, don't question." He knew he'd regret asking this but couldn't seem to stop his mouth working. "What the hell're you 'sposed ta be?" His voice sounded hoarse and throaty, and he cleared his throat.

The smile she gave him was the most dangerous thing he'd ever seen, and she'd raised one perfectly sculpted eyebrow. She stood gracefully, walking towards him slowly, and he fought the urge to back away. She trailed one hand up the lapel of his jacket, fingers skimming against the rough skin of his neck as she pulled him down to her height. He wasn't sure why he let her do it, but before he could stop he felt her warm breath on her ear, felt one hand rest flat against his cheek. He voice was a whisper.

"She's a temptation." He shivered.

And with that she'd stepped back, crossing the cargo bay to stand with her brother and Kaylee. As she brushed past him, the briefest contact of her cotton clad shoulder making him hold his breathe, he tried to figure her out. His physical reaction was enough that he knew he couldn't just wish this away, and the urge to tear her shirt open, the desire to take her, was enough to make his head spin. As he watched her walk towards her brother, watched the elegant swish of the short skirt against her long legs, he wondered how the hell he was going to survive after this. And it was obvious who was to blame.

Yup, this was all Kaylee's fault.

**A/N:** Are we having fun people? Please review!


	3. Thanksgiving

**TITLE:** Thanksgiving

**DISCLAIMER:** Nup, nope, nada, zip, zero, zilch.

**A/N:** Three chapters in one day…I really should be doing uni work but hey, it's only law school right? :P I'm dedicating to this chapter to RevDorothyL who, aside from reviewing pretty much every Firefly story I've written in wonderful detail, also takes the time to point out any errors she spots, which helps me no end as I don't have a Beta. Many thanks!

**THANKSGIVING**

In the days after Kaylee's Halloween party the crew had all noticed a change. People were more relaxed, their family was more comfortable, and previous tensions had slowly but surely been worked on. The news of Wash and Zoe's baby had been a wonderful reminder of the joy life had to offer, and every member of the crew was preparing themselves for their future niece or nephew.

Kaylee would occasionally bounce with excitement, and she was helping Wash construct a bassinet from old engine parts. Her happiness was visible to anyone looking at her, and everybody knew that Simon was also a big part of that. Although he still occasionally put his foot in his mouth (Jayne had joked there was a magnet attached somewhere) he still managed to show Kaylee how much she meant. He'd performed Zoe's check-ups with the utmost care, refusing to let anything slip by, and was happy to be able to tell the couple that everything was on track. By November she was at least four months along, and the thought that she was pregnant while they had survived Miranda enough to give every crew member a moment of pause.

Mal, after his initial shock and anger at his first mate being out of commission, was now surprising everyone with his protectiveness. Even Wash was amused by his antics, knowing how close Zoe was to punching her Captain when he kept telling her to sit down and rest. He'd finally gotten the point when he'd pulled out her chair at dinner one night – she'd glared him down into his own seat and refused to speak to him for the rest of the meal.

Inara found the whole thing terribly amusing, and was relieved that she could once again interact with Mal confidently. She'd thrown herself into the role of cook, and every crew member was glad for the nutritious and tasty meals she seemed to have a knack for throwing together. How she managed to make protein taste that good was beyond them, but everyone was thrilled. Her newfound position on the ship gave her the strength she needed to quit the guild, deciding to undertake correspondence study as a Mediator, and Mal would be lying if he said he wasn't relieved. It looked like she was staying on for a while.

Book had also begun to grow more comfortable with his place in the crew. His time in the abbey had given him a number of useful household skills, and he had spoken to the Captain about undertaking the roll of cleaner. He found the menial labour refreshing, and although Mal couldn't offer him a particularly large salary, he knew his own reserves would last him quite a while. The ship had never been cleaner, and every member of the crew was grateful that Jayne would no longer have laundry duty. The sheets of Simon's bed were still an odd pinkish hue after a rogue red sock had been "accidently" left in the washer. Luckily Kaylee didn't seem to mind.

River herself had been hired on by Mal as a crew member, something Simon knew delighted her no end. Feeling needed after so long being a burden was incredibly important to his younger sister, and if some of her enjoyment seemed to come out of spending time with Jayne, Simon said nothing. With Zoe in a delicate condition (a phrase that had earned a spoon to Mal's head from the lady in question) River now undertook bodyguard work, as well as using her Sight to help Mal in the planning process. Because of her added help, Mal found himself at the receiving end of far less bullets, and more often than not they were paid, and paid well.

So when Kaylee told them that they were having a Thanksgiving dinner, nobody had refused. They all knew they had plenty to be thankful for, and once again they were thrown into planning the evening. A stop off on Persephone had allowed Inara and Book to procure not only a bounty of fresh vegetables, but also a large turkey and a couple of fat chickens. The chickens were stuffed with garlic and herbs, before being rubbed down with real butter and left to slowly roast alongside leeks and shallots. The turkey had a stuffing of nuts, vegetables and bread crumbs, and the smell of roasting pumpkin, potatoes, yams, onions and carrots dressed with rosemary meant that Jayne was regularly chased from the kitchen.

The table was made up by Kaylee and River, the latter of whom had carefully folded some stunning origami flowers in ruby red, emerald green and sapphire blue. By the time Simon and Jayne had returned with the alcohol the dinner was almost ready. Mal and Wash helped carry everything over to the table, and there wasn't a mouth left unwatering at the sight of such a rich bounty. Mal was so excited he even allowed the Shepherd to say grace. As soon as he finished everyone prepared to dig in, only to be stopped by Kaylee.

"Wait! We gotta go round an' say ev'rything we're thankful for!" Jayne rolled his eyes, only to flinch as River pinched his arm hard. Kaylee looked expectantly to the Captain, who cleared his throat, looking uncomfortable.

"Well, guess I'm thankful y'all are here, thankful we all made it this far. Glad fer all this fancy tucker we've been blessed with." He stopped, looking to Zoe at his right. One hand rested on her stomach, joined by Wash's.

"Well I'm thankful fer the young'un in my stomach, and even more thankful that my mornin' sickness has stopped!" Everybody shared a laugh at that before Wash spoke.

"Well I'm thankful for my shiny wife, an' thankful Simon didn't help with the cookin'!" Everybody grinned, even the Doctor.

"I'm thankful I've got Kaylee, and thankful River has been doing so well lately," People chuckled as Kaylee blushed and River rolled her eyes. Kaylee teared up a little as she spoke.

"I'm just so thankful we're all gettin' along so well, an' that Simon got his head outta his pi gu!" Inara was next.

"I'm thankful I've found my place in the 'verse." If anyone noticed the intense look Mal was shooting towards the former Companion no one said a word. Book spoke next. "I'm thankful for this crew, thankful for this ship, and thankful for rosemary." Everyone shared a chuckled, remembering a time long ago when rosemary had been mentioned. People looked then to River. Her eyes were far-seeing, a small smile gracing her face.

"Thankful for then, thankful for now, thankful for later. Tick-tock, tick-tock. She waits."

Eyebrows were raised and glances were shared but nobody commented, knowing better than to question the strange words. Jayne looked decidedly uncomfortable.

"Guess I'm thankful fer tha food, an' glad we ain't wearin' costumes this time round." Everybody laughed hard, nobody noticing the glance he gave River or the smirk she sent back his way. He shifted uncomfortably in his seat, trying not to notice the cut of her pale peach dress, or how it reminded him of ice planets.

Thanks exchanged, everybody began to tuck in, moaning compliments to Inara and Book around mouthfuls of food. The chicken was tender enough to fall of the bone, the turkey rich and soft. People tore in, even Simon occasionally forgetting his table manners in the wake of such a feast. Glasses were filled and re-filled, merriment lacing every word spoken, until everyone had eaten their full.

Jibes and banter were thrown over the table. Zoe watched her inebriated comrades tease each other, laughing as Wash and Simon broke out into a drunken sing along. Jayne and Mal had taunted them for it, before deciding to join in themselves. Book was close to tears at the horrible sounds the men were producing, and Inara couldn't keep the wide, happy smile from her face. Jayne had drunkenly thrown an arm over the back of River's chair, and his singing would hitch whenever he accidently brushed her silky soft skin or that long dark hair.

River and Kaylee were giggling delightedly as Simon told them a story from his hospital days, even Jayne refusing to interrupt as the Doc stood and began acting out his gestures.

"And even if he _had_ tripped on it, even if it was an accident…" He paused for effect, arms thrown out before coming in and whispering conspiratorially. "Why was there a condom on it?"

The entire table went up in raucous laughter as Simon attempted to sit back down, Jayne refilling his glass of wine as a reward for his story telling. People slowly began to say their goodnights, a drunken Simon being dragged by Kaylee towards his room, Book shuffling off towards his own bed. Inara stood and walked towards Mal, bending and whispering something in his ear that made his eyes go round. He looked at her questioningly, only to be met by a sultry eyebrow raise. As she swept out of the galley Mal attempted to look casual as he bid the others goodnight and practically ran after her.

Zoe took an incredibly tipsy Wash by the hand, guiding him down the hall as he sang loudly. "Go me the way to show home, I'm bed and I wanna go to tired! I had a little hour about a drink ago and it head straight to my went!" His loud, off key voice grew fainter, and Jayne realized he was alone in the room with Crazy.

He stood quickly, heading towards his own bunk when a soft touch on his arm stopped him. He turned around and looked down at her, inhaling deeply in an attempt to clear his head. She stood close enough that her top brushed against his chest, her eyes sparkling in the galley light. That pretty peach dress set off her dark hair and eyes, and her skin seemed luminescent, an ethereal effect that made her look like a fairy.

"Needs more to be thankful for."

He was about to protest, about to call her a moonbrain and head to his bunk, when she stood on her very tiptoes, and brushed those pink lips against his. It was the softest kiss he'd ever experienced, the most innocent, the most chaste. It felt like the barely there touch of a butterfly, leaving behind only the faintest scent of her breath. Like a kiss from a schoolyard sweetheart, it was unsure and delicate.

His blood boiled in a way he'd never experienced before, every nerve on fire as she lowered herself back to the ground. The hands she'd placed on his shoulders to steady herself now slipped lightly down his chest before dropping to her sides as she stepped back, leaving a trail of fire over the shirt covered skin she touched. She smiled at him in a way that made his skin burn and his breathing hitch, before turning and sashaying towards her room.

He stared after her, even after she'd rounded the corner and disappeared, as if she'd suddenly pop back into the room. His head was clouded with drink and the feeling of that kiss, his hand coming up to skim over his lips, wondering if it had even happened at all or if this was some strange dream.

As he wandered back towards his bunk, hand still touching his mouth as if trying to rub away the memory, a thought occurred.

Just how thankful would she have to be to get naked?

**A/N:** Ok, not American, but love the spirit of your Thanksgiving holiday. I really hope I did it justice, I kinda thought that hundreds of years into the future it probably wouldn't be about the first Thanksgiving, but rather about the spirit of giving thanks. Hope I haven't mucked this up, please review!

P.S The sauce bottle story is from the stand up of the great Ricky Gervais :) It's exactly what you think.


	4. Christmas

**TITLE:** Christmas

**DISCLAIMER:** No no no no!

**A/N:** Ah Christmas, ain't it just the shiniest? Many thanks to jane0904 who was the very first reviewer for this little fic – gold star!

**CHRISTMAS**

Not every planet celebrated Christmas. Plenty of worlds had abandoned any semblance of religiosity, whilst others simply didn't have the means to make any kind of occasion out of it. Of course, Mal saying this to Kaylee while she was wearing that little red hat and holding up a bag with all their names on little bits of paper probably wasn't the best of idea. In fact, from the falter in her smile and the angry glare on Zoe's face it may have been the exact opposite of a good idea.

Inara digging her nails into his arm and pulling him from the galley affirmed what he'd already figured out – ruining Kaylee's secret Santa idea was a punishment worthy offence. He looked at the furious woman.

"Honest 'Nara, I was just sayin'. We didn' have anythin' like that back on Shadow." He glare deepened, and Mal was reminded that he didn't want to piss off the woman who had come to be his lover, especially given how she'd been feeling lately.

"Malcolm Reynolds, Kaylee has been planning this for weeks and you are going to sit back and enjoy it." He tone brooked no argument, and Mal knew that something else was bothering her. It wasn't his fault that she was so damn snippy lately, although he admitted to terror at the thought she might leave him. And then he got angry…cuz of all the terror. Which in turn pissed her off, which in turn made him scared again. Vicious cycle and all.

He was broken from his reverie when she dragged him back into the galley, his waiting crew watching him with a mixture of amusement and pity. He straightened up bravely, turning to Kaylee.

"Now little Kaylee, that weren' me sayin' no ta ya, just remindin' you-" A quick elbow to his ribs from the calm looking ex-Companion at his side silenced what he was about to say. He cleared his throat.

"Anyways, proceed." Kaylee beamed at him, reminding him how soft he'd become but finding he didn't mind. The mechanic went on to explain the rules.

"Ok, so next Friday is Christmas, an' we're all gonna pick a name outta the hat. Everyday til Christmas Day you've gotta get your someone a little somethin' special, even if it's just a note or something, until they get their real present on Christmas Day. It's only five days so no complainin'. That way everybody gets a present, seein' as we don't 'xactly have the means to buy for everyone. The present has to mean somethin', has to be somethin' ya think about real hard. It's gotta be special." She glared at Jayne, who wisely bit back his smartass comment. As the hat went around the group all watched each reaction closely, although everyone attempted to school their faces against joy or annoyance at their chosen name.

"Ok, now y'all gotta think real hard about this. It won't work if anybody doesn't participate." The whole crew wandered off thoughtfully, trying to come up with something for their person. Throughout the week people kept finding their little surprises, usually on a theme of some kind.

Every morning when Kaylee woke up there was a different coloured rose next to her pillow. Pink, yellow, red, blue, purple, one for every day leading up to Christmas. They were beautiful, immaculate flowers, each with a single word tied to a string around the base. Love, loyalty, passion, fidelity, royalty. She had her suspicions but decided to keep her mouth shut, not wanting to ruin her surprise.

Book found small gifts of various teas, each one designed to soothe or allow reflection and relaxation. Whilst it was fairly obvious who was giving each gift, he still appreciated the thoughtfulness in every gesture.

Zoe found baby presents every day. A pair of knitted booties, a tiny yellow jumpsuit with little ducks around the edges, a set of linens for a tiny cot, a handmade bonnet, and a book of baby names. Wash found things along a similar vein, although his presents consisted of little dinosaur figurines, each one a new addition to his collection.

Inara kept finding little packets of herbs and spices. Rosemary, turmeric, thyme, dill, and even a tiny packet of saffron. She smiled at the constant reminders of her new place on the ship, and was surprised to find the saffron, such an expensive herb and so rare to find.

Jayne didn't think he was getting any gifts at first until he noticed that every one of his guns had been cleaned and oiled. Every knife had been sharpened, his ammo supplies had been restocked, his laundry had been collected and every item folded, and finally a small bottle of whisky left on his pillow. He was confused but pleased, he'd been worried that Crazy would've gotten him, and he didn't want to find insane scribbling or peach cans lying around.

Simon found a packet of gauze, a new scalpel, alcohol wipes, pressure pads, and a leaflet of new bullet wounds and their treatment.

River received a butterfly clip for her hair, a pair of black silk stockings, a small bottle of fine perfume, and a book of Grimm's fairy tales.

Mal found blueprints to several large bank vaults on various Core planets. Each had detailed notes attached, providing information as to security, codes, staff and timetables. Every morning at breakfast the crew would thank whoever their secret Santa was and tell the rest of the crew what they'd recieved, trying to gauge reactions. On the fifth day, Christmas Eve, River refused to say what her secret Santa had left for her, smiling serenely at the others. People attempted to guess at who had them.

"Well I reckon it must be Simon who keeps leaving me all those flowers." The Doctor smiled but shook his head, leaving Kaylee extremely confused.

"I think maybe Book has me, since he knows how much I love all those spices?" Book shook his head, "I thought you had me, since I keep getting left teas."

"Well I reckon it must be Zoe who keeps leavin' me all them blueprints." His first mate shook her head, before guessing that perhaps Kaylee had her. Wash guessed that perhaps River was leaving the toys for him, whilst Jayne admitted he had no clue, suggesting Mal as a possibility. Simon looked confused for a moment, before also suggesting River as the gifter of medical supplies.

River declined to comment, which everyone thought was fair seeing as she probably already knew. Kaylee's excitement was touching.

Ok everyone, tomorrow it's Christmas! We'll all have a sleep-in, and then do our big lunch. We can open the presents during supper." Jayne opened his mouth to protest but she cut him off quickly. "No complaints! We gotta make sure the day isn't over too quick." The crew ambled towards their bedrooms, each attempting to read peoples expressions and avoid being read themselves.

Christmas Day the crew enjoyed the first lie in they'd had in months. Chores had been undertaken earlier in the week and only Inara and Book, having foregone their sleep-in in favour of simply going to bed early, were up and about. They worked hard on the meal throughout the morning, and by the time the rest of the crew rose the boat was filled with the deliciously rich smells.

It was a feast to rival Thanksgiving. Vegetables, chicken, turkey and ham were laid out. Fresh bread had been baked, and the smell of the buttered rolls was enough to silence any protest the crew may have had about putting a cut of their earnings towards the meal. River had awoken before the others and had produced fairy lights, which now hung on the walls of the galley and were twined all over the catwalk and walls of the cargo bay.

Bright gold and red ribbons decked the rooms of the ship, and even Mal had to admit the place looked pretty special. Although no tree had been found, River had obtained a bucket and a broom, twining first wire and then lights around it to twinkle golden in the cargo bay.

The meal was delicious, each crew member stuffed to the gills by the time dessert was sent around. It was decided the rich Christmas cake, pumpkin pie, and pastries would be saved for supper. The afternoon was spent cleaning up, and each crew member found a moment to sneak down into the cargo bay and leave their present under the "tree".

Jayne sat on his weight bench, looking around the silent cargo bay, transformed by the twinkling fairy lights. The main lights had been turned off, and the bay was given and darkly cosy feeling, reminding him of Christmas at home. He'd spent the last few weeks watching Crazy, trying to figure out if that kiss in the galley had been real or not. She hadn't given a thing away, simply floating around as she normally did.

This past week he'd found himself oddly disappointed not to have pulled her name out of the hat, wondering why he felt that way when he wouldn't have had a clue what to get her anyway. He shouldn't even be thinking on her like that, but that kiss had done something to him. Everything she did seemed to drive him insane, those tight dresses, the way she moved, the sound of her laughter echoing throughout the ship when she played with Kaylee. He wondered what it would be like to have Christmas with her, wondered what he would have got her if he'd pulled out her name.

He thought about the ring his mother had given him the day he'd left. It had been only the day after Christmas, the happy day a nice send off, full of laughter and memories. They never had money to get anything really shiny, but it hadn't been about that. With all his brothers and sisters around him, and his parents smiling happily at their rowdy brood, it had been one of the last times he'd felt at home. The next day, before he'd left, his mother had pulled him aside. Vera Cobb was a small, slender woman, and many found the sight of her and that big tall husband of hers mighty strange. They thought the picture looked even funnier when Jayne and his younger brothers had hit their teens, all of them shooting up as tall as their Daddy. She'd taken Jayne to her bedroom, pulling out a box from under the bed.

"Now you ain't gonna need this for a while, but one day you will." She had taken out a slim band of white gold with a single large diamond. He remembered watching how it sparkled on her fingers when he was young.

"Yer my first born, yer gonna need it. I know, I know," she cut off his protests. "I know you ain't in fer any of that stuff yet, but one day yer gonna meet a girl who's so damn shiny you want to put this on her just to see if it gets any shinier. And when you need it, it'll be here."

He'd taken it with a sigh, unable to disappoint his Ma, before he'd said goodbye and left his home world. Even though he'd been back a few times, his Ma never mentioned the ring, never even asked about it when his brothers all started getting married, followed by his sisters. She'd just smile in that knowing way that made him feel like she could see something he couldn't, and tell him she loved him.

He wondered why he was thinking about the damn ring at all. He was jerked from his thoughts by the sound of numerous footsteps.

"Jayne, you ain't peekin' on anythin' down here are ya?" Mal was using his Captain voice, the effect slightly muddled by the warmth of the whisky he'd drunk with lunch. Jayne smirked and shook his head as his comrades entered the room and began to sit around the tree. Kaylee had asked him and Simon to bring a small table downstairs, and the others had brought the desserts and drinks to put on the table while presents were distributed. A larger chair had been brought to the side of the "tree", which Kaylee informed a tipsy Mal that he had to sit in and play Santa from, seeing as he was the head of the ship and all.

He'd grinned at that, hadn't even complained when she'd plopped that silly red and white had on his head, the pom pom falling to one side as he sat down heavily. Zoe made note of the smile Inara was trying to conceal at his ridiculous antics.

"Right, I'mma be needin' a lil' helper. Kaylee, don' I gets a lil helper?" Kaylee smiled at her inebriated Captain as Simon giggled in that high pitched way he did when he was drunk. "Sure ya do Cap'n, she's just bringin' the last of the food."

As if on cue River moved quickly down the stairs, balancing the plate of pastries on one hand and setting it in the empty space on the table in front of Jayne. His mouth hung open. Instead of the dress she had been wearing at lunch, she'd changed into a little red skirt trimmed with white faux fur, and a black shirt. Her chocolate curls tumbled down under a hat just like the Captains, and it quickly became obvious who was playing elf this evening.

"Well ain't you jus' a sight lil' River, you keep dressin' like that an' Jayne's mouth ain't ever gonna close." Jayne shook himself out of his staring, eyes firmly stuck on the table top as his crewmates laughed around him.

"I think she looks right cute Cap'n. Did I say that alright wifey, is cute an ok word?" The five months pregnant Zoe smiled at her husband. "Well it probably ain't the word Jayne woulda used, but I think cute works quite nicely." River smiled at the couple, before returning to her task. She picked up the nearest present, bringing it to the smiling Captain.

"Let's see, ok, this firs' one is fer Zoe." River carried it over to the first mates waiting hand. _To a beautiful Mother-to-be, Merry Christmas. Book_. She grinned at the preacher, opening her gift of parenting books and a single cigar. He smiled, "That's more for the father to be, to celebrate the happy day." She thanked him as River moved on. Wash was next, tearing open the bright paper covering a huge encyclopaedia of dinosaur information. _The only gift I could think of for the man who has everything. Simon._

He smiled at the Doctor as Zoe rolled her eyes, "Well I ain't gonna see him for months now!" The group chuckled as Mal proclaimed that the next present was for Book. _Preacher, I figured you'd like all this fancy go se. Jayne_ He opened the roughly wrapped box containing a tea set in fine china.

"Jayne, this is very kind, thank you." The mercenary mumbled something under his breath, glaring at River to make her move on. She simply smiled at him, picking up the next gift to give to Mal.

"Simon, looks like yer up next." The doctor thanked River as she handed him his present, which was just in an envelope. _Figured it's good to have you up to date, Merry Christmas Doc! Wash_. It was a subscription to a medical journal for an entire year. Using the cortex, Simon could now access the latest medical findings at just a click of a button. He thanked Wash profusely, while the pilot shrugged it off, saying it was a gift for everyone.

Mal himself was up next, eagerly tearing open his gift, looking quizzically at the blueprints for Serenity. Kaylee grinned at him. "It's from me, but River's been helpin' all week with those blueprints. The schematics yer holdin' show ya where we've made adjustments – her speed should be up 12% and we've begun work on a force field barrier."

Mal looked about ready to cry he was so happy, standing up and gripping both of the girls tightly to him. The rest of the crew looked on as he thanked them again and again, before being told gently but firmly to sit down and continue by an impatient Inara. He grinned and accepted the drink Wash handed him, the pilot smiling mischievously when Inara glared.

The ex-Companion was up next, thanking River as she was passed her gift. Inside the wrapping was a beautiful, handmade spice rack. It had her name carved into the wood at the top, and she realized it had been made especially for her. Mal looked sheepish.

"It fixes on the kitchen wall, but you don' gotta use it iffen ya don't like it." She blinked back a tear at the thoughtfulness of his present, and stood, hugging him tightly and planting a soft kiss on his cheek. The Captain grinned happily at his success, knowing she'd felt bothered by her lack of place in the crew previously.

Jayne took his gift, his eagerness to open his present almost overpowering his desire to stare at the girl handing it to him. He ripped off the paper to see a slim white box. He carefully opened the lid to find…a ribbon. A length of ribbon, about two metres long, in dark crimson red. The note simply read, _Merry Christmas, from River._

He looked up at the girl in question. "Uh…thanks?" She nodded solemnly, but her eyes seemed to sparkle with something he wasn't quite sure of. If he felt disappointed at the lack of any real present he refused to let it show.

Kaylee was up next, carefully unwrapping her small box. Inside was a simple golden band with a pink diamond. _Kaylee, Simon asked me to give you this, Merry Christmas. Love, Zoe._ She squealed as Simon lowered himself down on one knee, trying not to wobble from the alcohol still in his system.

"Kaylee, I know we haven't been together that long, but I feel as if I've known you a lifetime. I'll promise to spend the rest of my life trying to show you how important you are to me. Please do me the honour of being my wife."

Kaylee was crying, a happy smile engulfing her whole face, and she jumped atop the doctor, repeating yes over and over again. The crew all cheered, new rounds were poured, and congratulations were thrown this way and that. Hugs were exchanged, Inara and Zoe made the appropriate noises over Kaylee's beautiful ring, and Mal drunkenly attempted to threaten Simon if anything were to make her sad.

The doctor himself was grinning as though he couldn't believe his luck, and Jayne and Book both clapped him on the back. Jayne looked at him curiously. "How'd you manage ta say all that without messin' it up?" Simon looked around sheepishly. "Um, River actually made me write it all down and learn it by heart."

His sister looked towards them and smiled approvingly at her brother, turning back to Kaylee and listening to the chatter. The evening had turned into an impromptu engagement party, and everyone drank, laughed, and joked for hours. Sometime during the evening a music player had been brought into the cargo bay, and Simon and Kaylee were now slowly turning in the centre of the big floor, eyes on one another, happy smiles lighting up the whole room.

Inara smiled at the happy couple, looking to Mal, who had pulled her into his lap and was resting his head on her shoulder, watching his doctor and his mechanic. At the same time, both of them gently rested their hands on her stomach, a secret smile passing between the two. Zoe noticed, and nudged at Wash, pointing it out. They smirked at each other, before looking down to where their own baby lay sleeping.

Jayne looked up from his umpteenth glass of whisky, glancing over at Book who was dozing in the chair beside him. He looked around the cargo bay, wondering where the crazy girl had got to. He yawned, standing and stretching before making his way towards his bunk. He stopped briefly to look for his "present" but couldn't seem to find the weird ribbon anywhere. He shrugged, wasn't like he'd wanted it anyway.

He stepped down the ladder into his bunk, only to find the dark room had been covered in those golden fairy lights. Standing in the centre of the room was his secret Santa. She was clad in her boots, a pair of black stockings that came up mid-thigh, a pair of black satin panties with red ribbon ties on either side, and the long crimson ribbon. The length of it had been wrapped around her breasts, finishing in a large bow at the front. Her rich hair was curling around her shoulders, the fairy lights making her pale skin glow, her dark eyes twinkling with amusement. She had her hands on her hips, cocked to one side, and she was smiling.

"Doesn't he want to open his gift?" He blinked, closed his mouth, and stalked towards her.

If this wasn't the shiniest gorram Christmas present in the 'verse, he didn't know what was.

**A/N:** Hello children, how did we all enjoy that? Ah Christmas, ya gotta love it!


	5. Valentine's Day

**TITLE:** Valentine's Day

**DISCLAIMER:** Sigh, nothing here is mine little ones :(

**A/N:** Many people have commented that they didn't find out what River got – my own shameful oversight. I've attempted to explain it here…although please feel free to let me know if it doesn't work and I'll just re-jig the last chapter.

**VALENTINE'S DAY**

The ship was consumed with excitement and energy. Kaylee had expressed her ultimate wish to be married on Valentine's Day and Simon, along with the rest of the crew, was determined to make it happen. Every member was grateful to Kaylee for pulling them out of their melancholy through her family activities, nothing less than perfect was expected. Mal had agreed to set a course with Wash that would allow them to stop over on Kaylee's home planet of Gaia and the crew had been roped into every aspect of the planning. River and the heavily pregnant Zoe were to be Kaylee's bridesmaids, with Inara accepting the role of maid of honour with grace and joy.

The men hadn't escaped their roles in the wedding party. Book would be marrying the happy couple, with Mal and Wash standing as groomsmen. Simon's choice of best man had surprised everyone, especially Jayne himself. However the ancient animosities they'd shared had been burned away in the hellfire of Miranda and, with Simon relaxing into his role as doctor and thief, the two had formed a tentative friendship.

The two could be found engaging in the strangest activities together. Simon had begun working out, while Jayne had agreed to undergo some basic first aid training, a basic move that could save lives when they were in the field. The two found a thread of commonality in their hatred of operas ("Ruttin' whiney go se"/ "Ridiculous self-indulgences of the wealthy") and intense enjoyment of a good card game. Zoe had informed the two that if they took any more cash off of her husband, who seemed unable to fold a single hand "Just in case!" she would hide their stash of whisky. As far as threats from Zoe went, it wasn't the worst thing they'd ever heard, but the glint in the eye of a woman looking so…uncomfortable, was enough to silence any protests. It hadn't helped that they'd both been drunk at the time, desperately trying to control their bubbling giggles before erupting into a messy pile of laughter.

So when Simon had asked him to stand as best man Jayne had accepted, though not without some guilt. Ever since Christmas Night, when River had presented him with the best gorram gift he'd ever received, he couldn't seem to get enough of her. Every opportunity he could he'd grab her, pulling her into closets and bunks and claiming her again and again. Not that the girl seemed to mind, smiling whenever he pounced on her, biting and tearing at his shoulders to keep from screaming. Even worse, every single time he took her she was wearing something underneath her dresses that would make his eyes bug out. Thin strips of black lace that barely covered her thin frame, a tight red corset that did things to her chest that he couldn't formulate sentences for. One time, white cotton panties and bra embroidered with tiny Callahan shells. He'd nearly bit through his lip to stop from screaming when he came. He wanted to rub himself over her, wanted to mark her with anything her could; scent, sight, sound, anything to tell people she was his.

Which was definitely at odds with his desire to live at least a few more years. Despite the distraction of the wedding and the announcement of Inara's pregnancy and all that, he still knew every time he took her was another time closer to being caught. Knew that the next time could be the time that any one of the crew would discover his animalistic behaviour towards their young Reader. Knew that, depending on the discoverer, he could be facing anything from the airlock to poisons to paralysis by scalpel.

And damn if knowing that didn't seem to make every moan, every gasp, every whimper he could wring from her perfect pink mouth sound all the ruttin' sweeter. She was so shiny. She was too ruttin' shiny. Part of him longed to drag her down to his level, to pull her through his dirt and muss up that perfect shininess, and another part knew undoubtedly that he couldn't touch her. Nothing could tar that brightness.

He had to admit that the there was a time when the thought of the Doc knowing his sweet little sister was clawing and scratching like a hellcat at the "man-ape thing" would have tickled him something fierce. Still, his newfound friendship with Simon seemed tainted by the heavy guilt laying over him, and he wasn't enjoying his rediscovered conscience. But one look at River, a Core beauty with brains to match, and he knew he wasn't good enough for her, would never be good enough for her. Knew there was nothing in this lifetime he could possibly give her to make him deserve to call her his own. And a part of him hated himself at the thought of how much that hurt him.

He'd told River one night that he didn't want to do this anymore. The girl, skin still pink and slicked with sweat, hair spread over his pillow like it belonged there, had just smiled.

"He tries and tries. Tick-tock, counting down. She waits." And with that she'd slipped from under him, dressed in a flash, and been up his ladder before he could say "Huh?" He'd been staying away from her for three days now, feeling her working like a sickness through his system, heat consuming him like napalm over his skin. She hadn't even tried to approach him, not a single glance had been sent his way, and he found himself angry and confused by her apparent indifference. She seemed completely unaffected by him, only smiling politely but distantly when she was required to interact. Meanwhile he hadn't slept since the night she'd darted from his room. Hadn't washed his sheets, desperate to smell her salty sweat and apple scented shampoo. The cold touch of the bulkhead would remind him of her night-cool skin, the taste of chilli in last night's dinner reminding him of the painful pleasure of being with her. He couldn't escape the tactile reminders of her, and he knew it was affecting his behaviour.

Still, with everyone so distracted with Kaylee's wedding happening tomorrow, he didn't think anyone had noticed. Waves were sent back and forth between her and the Fryes, her parents thrilled beyond belief that their only little girl was getting married to the young doctor she'd told them about so often. Jayne was getting desperate to touch land, to be able to escape her, even if just for a second.

The touchdown on Gaia was easy, the large farm of the Fryes providing adequate room for their flying home. Aunts, Uncles and Cousins had swamped both the mechanic and her fiancée, pleased their darling little Kaylee had returned with that great big smile on her face. After a fine meal at the homestead the men took Simon out for a night of drinking. Jayne, head thick with liquor, had desperately tried to find something attractive in the stripper embarrassing Simon. Tall, buxom, long blonde her whipping this way and that, she was exactly what she should be.

All he could think of was that she was too solidly built, too tanned, too blonde. His mind seemed aching for the chance to just imagine a thin dark body, long dark hair and flashing brown eyes instead of bored blue ones. His eyes crossed with the effort of focussing on the blonde. He sighed into his drink, looking to where Book was sitting uncomfortably. The preacher's eyes seemed to hold some kind of sympathy, and Jayne shook his head, thinking he must have imagined it.

* * *

"He doesn't know we know does he?" Inara had a slight smile on her face, watching as Kaylee played with River's hair. The Reader shrugged, "Refuses to see, refuses to acknowledge. For now." The smirk on her face was something evil, and Inara found herself laughing.

"Does he actually think that Simon bought you all that underwear?" Kaylee giggled at the thought of poor Simon picking out things like that for his sister. River smiled knowingly. "Can't formulate any thoughts beyond _mine _and _fuck_. Christmas gift was much appreciated." Zoe entered at this point carrying the fabric of Kaylee's wedding dress, which Inara had created out of a specially commissioned bolt of silk. The fabric was of the palest, most delicate pink, setting off Kaylee's skin and eyes to a stunning sparkle. Her only adornment was a thin golden chair and a pair of dangling gold earrings, both borrowed from Zoe. Her brown curls were half up, held in place by a simple golden clip, the rest lying over her bare shoulders.

The bridesmaids' dresses were in deepening shades of pink. Inara wore a dress of rose, cut to hide the miniscule bump of her stomach. Zoe, seven months along and still stunning, wore magenta, and River's gown was a dark crimson colour. She had smiled cheekily when Kaylee had shown her the colour, mumbling something about pretty shiny memories.

Kaylee inhaled nervously as her mother bustled in to Inara's old shuttle, designated as the girls changing area, all males banned from entering. She teared up at the sight of her beautiful daughter dressed like a princess, remembering her own wedding so many years ago. This man was the man for her daughter, Kyra Frye had known straight away. The Doctor had charmed them all with his shy smile and nervous attempts at politeness. He was a straight arrow alright, but in Kaylee's presence he seemed to relax, his eyes holding all the incredulous adoration a mother could hope for. The perfect offset to her bubbly, earthy daughter.

Her father blinked back tears as his baby girl hugged him, standing back as her crewmates walked down the aisle together. The backyard of the Frye home had been decked with red and pink roses, usually rare but local to Gaia. The theme of Valentine's Day was kept simple, the flowers and the red tables clothes in the reception area all Kaylee wanted. After seeing that ruffled pink dress she'd worn to the ball last year, Inara was surprised and relieved at Kaylee's discretion. Jayne tried desperately to be pleased that he was paired with Inara, the former Companion radiant and immaculate in her gown, but could only think of River, walking down on Mal's arm. Wash and Zoe were beaming, one of his hands seemingly affixed to her swollen stomach as they walked down next. As Jayne took his position he saw his Captain whisper something to the Reader that elicited a trill of soft laughter, clenching his fists until his short nails drew blood from the effort of trying to calm himself down.

The damn girl couldn't have looked more beautiful, the bolt of raw crimson silk adhering to her chest in a way that reminded him of the first time he'd taken her, her rich curls tumbling over her shoulders under a thin wreath of flowers around her head. He wrenched his head away from her, looking at Simon as the younger man looked at Kaylee. Eyes all open, reverence and joy and adoration pouring from every pour of his body, looking at his bride walk towards him as if he couldn't believe his luck. Jayne hated him, hated the way the boy's heart was visible for anyone to see, hated how easily he laid himself bare, falling and not doubting for a second that she would catch him.

The moment of hatred passed, and he knew that he couldn't begrudge the other man the happiness he'd managed to find in such a terrible situation. Book began to speak.

"There's very little in the 'verse that makes sense, very little we can ever hope to truly understand. More than anything we are unable to understand the mysteries of love. And yet, we don't need knowledge to feel. We can feel with everything we have, and that is what this young couple has shown us again and again. That two people, so different, can find one another in this strange 'verse, and love as wholly and as truly as I know them to love, is truly a miracle. And not a person who sees them can doubt the love we see today." He gestured to Simon to speak.

"Kaylee. I've never known anyone like you before; never known I could find the whole world wrapped up in one person. You are the only woman in the 'verse, the only one. I would be lucky just to say I knew you, let alone be able to call you my wife. I'll never stop loving you, and I promise to spend the rest of my life showing you over and over how much you mean to me." River was staring intently at her brother, pride written all over her pretty face. Inara dabbed delicately at her eyes, whilst Wash was desperately trying to control the little sobs that were wracking his body. Jayne rolled his eyes but had to admit the Doc had done alright. Kaylee cleared her throat, her voice low and shaking as she spoke.

"Simon, I ain't never met anyone like you either. You make me feel like I could fly iffen I wanted to, and every day I spend with you is happier than the last. Thank you fer askin' me ta be yer wife, I promise I'll spend the rest of my life making you happy for doin' it."

As Book pronounced them husband and wife, as Simon drew her into a kiss that lasted far too long, as the crowd began to cheer and catcall, Jayne finally figured it out. Kaylee made Simon happy, just as she was. As he met River's eyes he knew she'd seen his epiphany, was looking at him as proudly as she'd looked at Simon. Maybe it didn't matter that he weren't no Core boy and would never have more than a few bullets to rub together, maybe she didn't care that he didn't know any fancy words and was a big, filthy minded merc.

Maybe just loving her was enough.

The party had gone long into the morning, guests slowly and sleepily excusing themselves until only the crew and Kaylee's immediate family were left. Sitting around the tables that had been set in the large yard of the homestead, people were comfortable and relaxed, enjoying the warm summer breeze and the scent of lilacs. Inara was dozing inelegantly on Mal's shoulder, while the Captain, Wash and Simon laughed over something Book was saying. Zoe and Kaylee were speaking quietly with the Fryes, but every now and then people's eyes would flick to the little stand of trees off to the side, where a thin girl had convinced an oversized mercenary to dance with her.

_Ma,_

_You was right. It looks even shinier on her._

_Jayne._

A/N: Flufftastic, I know, but don't we all love a good dollop of honey on our favourite couple? Please review! I still have more occasions I want to write about, but if you had any you'd desperately like to see I'm open to suggestions!


	6. Unification Day

**TITLE:** U-Day

**DISCLAIMER:** Nothing is mine.

**A/N:** Sorry for the long pause, Uni required attention (the nice people in the law department get grumpy If you don't submit your obscenely long assignments…) Thanks to everyone who has so far reviewed this story, you can't imagine your awesomeness. Brown-In-The-Black suggested U-Day, and I just can't resist a good bar brawl, so here we go!

**UNIFICATION DAY**

Simon knew from the very start that this would end badly. Mal, a bar, several bottles of whisky and, the cherry on top, it was Unification Day. Zoe and Wash were expecting their little one in about three weeks, and Mal had somehow convinced his first mate to let her husband come out for a drink. A rapid succession of concerned looks had immediately followed, and Jayne, Simon and Inara had quickly offered to go with them. Zoe had raised one eyebrow, saying that she would also be attending, her quick flashing glance enough to silence Simon's protests.

The rest of the crew had also decided to come along, and the atmosphere in the bar was light and exuberant. Simon watched from his seat as Jayne sat down heavily beside River, one massive arm slung over the back of her chair, his fingers gripping her shoulder possessively. Simon couldn't blame him, having noticed the stares several young men were sending her way, but it was still a strange sight to see. He wasn't sure he'd ever get used to his sister and the big mercenary, even with the solidifying events that had happened after his own wedding.

Simon and Kaylee had been given five days for their honeymoon, and they'd spent it in an old cabin her parents had in the woods. The crew had loaded up the mule with supplies, including an extremely rare bottle of champagne that Inara had kept stashed, as well as ice coolers stuffed full of various foods. Simon had blushed when he'd seen Mal and Jayne smirking as they put cream and strawberries in the cooler, laughing at his discomfort and patting his back amicably.

He had yet to comment on seeing River and Jayne dancing together, and the big man's discomfort and anxiety was apparent, but Simon refused to think of anything but his own vacation with his beautiful bride. The time spent in the cabin had been wonderful, and they'd returned to the ship, which had remained on the Frye's property so the crew could also enjoy some downtime, feeling refreshed and sated. Wash had gently ribbed Simon for the dark circles under his eyes, but the tired man had only grinned as he sat down at the dinner table. They'd taken off into the black after warm goodbyes and promises to visit soon, as well as more than a few jokes about wanting grandbabies. Mrs Frye had even pointedly asked Mal about his intentions regarding the pregnant Inara, and the Captain's blustering babble had made everyone laugh. The crew was in high spirits as they sat down at the table, enjoying a meal together and teasing the happy couple.

"Well Simon, you heard Mrs Frye, gonna be in any baby Tams running around soon?" Mal had looked briefly annoyed at the idea of more babies running around his gorram ship, but a sharp look from the woman carrying his own child was enough to take the sting out of his words. Kaylee blushed prettily, glancing around the table as the crew laughed and joked.

"Well we ain't 'xcatly plannin' anythin', but if somethin' were ta happen we wouldn't m-" She suddenly stopped talking as she stared at the fourth finger of River's left hand. The crew followed her eyeline to the sparkling diamond lying on a slim band of white gold. River looked up, smiling secretively as she turned to Jayne. The mercenary had never looked more nervous or uncomfortable in his whole life.

"Ah, well, ya see, me an' the girl, we're gettin' hitched."

All hell broke loose. Mal had pulled a gun on Jayne, only to find Simon producing his own weapon just as quickly. Kaylee, about to shout happily, was now frightened and crying as the Captain and Simon roared at Jayne for daring to lay a hand on the girl.

"Dancing's one thing but if you think an ape-man with his head up his pi gu is going to marry my sister you're dumber than I thought you were." Mal had quickly agreed, while Wash and Book looked at the two nervously. Threats of airlocks flew around the room, and Mal quickly demanded Jayne off the ship. The mercenary had been silent the entire time, refusing to show the pain this was causing him, refusing to show anything but fierce anger and silence. He nodded his head once, quickly leaving the table, only to be followed swiftly by a furious looking River.

Simon and Mal had also left quickly, and were now sitting in the cockpit discussing a detour to Persephone to get rid of their dead weight. After twenty minutes of furious ranting from both of them, Zoe and Inara entered the cockpit along with a tearful looking Kaylee. The three women stood silently, staring at the two men who were looking angry and confused. Zoe had one hand resting on her stomach, looking every inch the protective mother she was, and her eyes were flashing with fury and disappointment.

"Before you two go making any decisions that you'll regret later, there's somethin' we think you should see." Simon opened his mouth to protest but a sharp look from Kaylee silenced him, and Inara was shaking with barely controlled rage. The Captain and the Doctor followed the three women to the catwalk of the cargo bay, where Wash and Book were already looking down at the scene below.

River was sobbing quietly against Jayne's chest, as the big man stroked her hair and spoke in a soothing voice. "Knew somethin' like this might happen baby, it's gonna be ok. They're jus' worried bout ya, mebbe this is fer that best."

River's sobs wracked her body, and she made a choked noise that broke Simon's heart. Jayne swiftly picked her up, hooking her legs over his arms, and moved to sit on a crate, the girl still held against his chest, resting in his lap.

"Ain't no need fer that baby-girl, we had a good run. You'll find someone else." River's voice was hoarse and whispery has she shook her head. "No one, needs him, can't be loved enough by anyone but him. Needs someone to love the girl and the weapon both. Can't drink the poison Romeo."

Mal watched as Jayne's face hardened. "No talk like that girly, it's gunna be alright, mebbe one day I'll come find ya again." River's hand was shaking as she moved to take the ring off her finger, but Jayne quickly stilled her movement.

"Naw girl, that's yers now. That ring ain't never been so shiny as it is right now, don't think I could look at it trapped in a ruttin' box when it belongs right where it is." River suddenly stopped sobbing, and her face cleared, though only Jayne could see it. She gently laid a hand on either side of his stubbled face as she looked at him with glazed eyes that were seeing something else.

"She lives with no other thought than to love, and be loved, by he." Mal had had enough, wrenching his eyes away from the heartbreaking scene. He looked at Simon, who suddenly looked older and more tired than he ever had before. The younger man nodded, and the rest of the onlooking crew breathed a sigh of relief as the Captain looked resignedly back down into the cargo bay. He gestured to the Shepherd.

"Go do your thing Preacher, ain't nuthin' more for us ta do here." Book looked at the Captain with pride and respect, before turning to enter the cargo bay. Simon looked at Mal quizzically.

"You don't think they might want to wait? Do this in a nicer setting?" Mal shook his head and cracked a smile. "Naw Doc, you wanna try ta get Jayne into a suit?"

And that was how this had come to be. Book had entered the floor of the cargo bay, talking in a low voice with Jayne, who looked up at the onlookers he hadn't noticed before, so wrapped up in his own heartbreak and River's pain.

"You sure bout this Cap't? Doc?" The two of them looked at each other, then at the stony faces of the women who had shown them what they were too pig headed to see. Simon spoke for both of them.

"You have our blessing."

Jayne looked at them shocked for a moment, then down at the slip of a girl in his arms. He grinned widely, eyes blazing, as he swiftly stood and placed her beside him. He addressed the two men who had almost taken everything away from him.

"Reckon you might regret sayin' that."

Kaylee was now crying tears of happiness, Zoe moving to stand by her husband, a slight smile gracing her usually solemn face. Inara laid one hand on Mal's arm, looking at him in that wily way she had.

"I'm proud of you Mal, you've done the right thing." Her simple words made him grin as he gave her a quick kiss.

Jayne grazed his fingers across Binky nervously, his palms sweating, wondering if River would turn around and tell him she didn't want this. She looked up at him, he eyes now clear and her smile shy and warm. And he knew. He threw an arm around her waist, drawing her in front of him so they were both facing the preacher, her back pressed against his chest.

"Best make it fast Shepherd, 'fore they change their minds."

And that was how River Tam disappeared, becoming River Cobb. Simon laughed quietly as he thought of his own eyes bugging out when his sister had reminded him that he was now brother-in-law to the mercenary. They'd been letting Mal get steadily drunk, Jayne keeping up but not yet past tipsy, when the comment was heard.

"E'rybody raise them glasses to tha glorious Alliance. To Unification!" Shouts had filled the bar, exclamations and here here's filling the room. Mal looked up and grinned, before looking to Jayne, who nodded. Zoe rolled her eyes, before standing with Inara and moving to a position near the door and away from the main throng of people. Kaylee placed a quick kiss on Simon's cheek before joining her female crew mates. Jayne looked down at his wife, glancing to where the women stood, and noticed with pride her wryly raised eyebrow. He grinned. That's my girl.

Mal stood quickly, only swaying slightly from the whisky in his system, before walking towards the toaster. Book leaned back in his chair, shaking his head and smiling as the Captain said whatever inflammatory comment came to his head at the time. The large man was doughy, and his swing was wide, but it was enough.

All hell broke loose as bar patrons began joining in the fight and Jayne was quick to dive into the brawl, knocking together the heads of two particularly dirty fighters. Wash and Simon went to aid Mal, who was just barely holding his own against three other men, his doughy companion long since knocked out.

River smiled placidly at Book, who raised an eyebrow. "You're sure you want to go into this?" The young woman smirked at him, tilting her head to one side in an unconscious imitation of her husband.

"Where the pack goes, she goes." And with that she stood gracefully, moving into the centre of the brawl, grinning at her husband as she began to kick, flip and twirl her way through the room. The bartender and owner were unable to do more than stare as their establishment was torn apart, watching as slim woman caused more havoc than her other crewmates combined. She twirled a pool cue as a bo staff, before flinging it into the wall, pinning a man there by his jacket.

The biggest man of the group was delivering a pounding blow to a man who had cracked Simon across the jaw, and the faint sounds of sirens were heard in the distance. Suddenly Inara's voice rang out across the noisy bar, and Wash looked up to see Zoe leaning against the wall, teeth gritted in pain, one hand on her stomach. Jayne and River shared a lightening quick glance, nodding before turning to where Wash, Mal and Simon were fighting. Simon was managing to hold his own but was relieved when his sister joined them, gripping him and Wash by their jackets and pulling them out of the way of a thrown table. Jayne scooped a laughing Mal up off the floor, before using a window as a doorway.

Inara had run from the bar, starting up the ship without Wash's finesse but managing to get her air born. The others ran from the bar or jumped through Jayne's makeshift doorway, Simon and Kaylee on either side of Zoe as Wash ran ahead, shouting fearfully at the doctor.

They'd all headed straight for the infirmary, Mal having to shout at Wash to take over the controls for Inara, who was needed by Simon. By the time they were in the black Zoe was lying on the bed of the infirmary, panting harshly, her face slicked with sweat. She gripped Mal by the shirt, pulling his head until she glared into his eyes.

"No more gorram U-Day brawls, you hear me?" Mal could do little more than nod, gratefully handing over the reins to a terrified looking Wash. Zoe was gripping his hand tightly enough that it made Simon wince, and the doctor order everybody out. Inara stayed behind the bed, dabbing at Zoe's skull and reminding her to take deep breathes. Jayne was already outside, nervous enough in the situation, until Zoe screamed for him to get his pi gu inside. He entered the room, only to be immediately gripped by the irate first mate's other hand, feeling his bones shift and creak as she groaned and pushed.

He gritted his teeth, looking to where River had decided to sit cross legged on the other bed, watching him with calm eyes. "Why've I gotta hold 'er gorram hand-o-pain, little man's the one who knocked her up." He flinched when Zoe tightened her grip, before looking back at River. His little wife just smiled at him, and spoke so quietly only he could hear her.

"Practice."

Mal paced anxiously outside the infirmary, only sitting down when Kaylee threatened to hit him with a wrench, an uncommon threat belying her fear and concern. Book sat quietly on the couch outside the infirmary, studying the faces of the parents to be, a small smile gracing his lips when he saw Wash stroke Zoe's hair, noticing the way the first mate leaned into his touch.

Serenity welcomed her first baby at 0345 by ship clock, and he entered the world without a problem. Jason Malcolm Washburne was officially claimed by the entire ship as the most beautiful baby to ever be born. His father's wide blue eyes looked startling against the baby's coffee coloured skin and black corkscrew curls, and Kaylee was delighted to point out that he had a tiny smattering of freckles across the bridge of his little nose. Simon proclaimed him in perfect health, and proudly handed him over to his shocked parents. Neither could take their eyes off the little life they had created, and the rest of the crew withdrew to allow them some time to bond with their baby.

Wash turned to his wife, seeing tears in her eyes, something which he could count on one hand the number of times he'd seen. The last time had been when he'd survived the Reaver battering ram. He felt his own tears of joy as he looked at his son, cradled in his wife's exhausted arms.

"Wifey, we made a person. There was nothing, and then we made him, and now he's here, and I don't know what to do." Zoe smiled tiredly at him, passing the baby to his nervous arms, instructing him to mind the head.

"We love him, husband. That's the best we can possibly give him, and that's what we'll do."

Seven sets of very different eyes watched the couple from the window of the infirmary, not one of them capable of leaving, not wanting to miss something this huge. Inara leaned her head on Mal's shoulder, and the Captain looked down in fear and joy at her, one hand drifting over the miniscule bump under her dress.

Kaylee clung to a tired looking Simon, unable to stop from bouncing on her heels at the happiness in that little room, the doctor holding his wife to his side with an exhausted grin on his face. Book looked over the two couples, before looking back at the miracle that had occurred in the infirmary. He never imagined he would find his place in the 'verse on a ship like this one, but couldn't imagine for a second being unable to witness this moment. Besides, he thought he wouldn't mind being called Grandpa so terribly anymore.

Jayne held his wife against his chest, standing slightly back from the group, looking with awe at the tiny person Zoe and Wash had created. The boy was a perfect mix of the two of them, and Jayne felt a longing in his gut that he'd never felt before. He bent to whisper in River's ear.

"Were you serious with what you said in there." He felt her smile against his arm, one thin hand moving his large calloused palm down to her stomach, still flat and taut, and he felt that heated desire rise up inside of himself almost immediately.

"She is always serious."

Jayne was silent for a moment, unable to tear his eyes away from the new family in front of him, or tear his hand away from the one he had helped create. A thought suddenly occurred.

"Told 'em they'd regret it."

A/N: Man I can't seem to get this thick coating of marshmallow off myself – apparently I am only capable of writing sugary fluffiness. Still, it makes me happy, and I hope you enjoy it too! Please review :) River's quote is from Annabel Lee, a beautiful poem by Edgar Allen Poe. As always, suggestions are welcomed :)


	7. Mother's Day

**TITLE: **Mother's Day

**DISCLAIMER: **Not mine.

**A/N: **Sorry this has been taken me so long to finish – I had some angst to get out and this just isn't the fic to do that in. This is a happy place :) Big thanks to jsmudge who suggested Mother's Day!

**MOTHER'S DAY**

Inara was approximately two months pregnant when Jayne announced to the dining table that he and River were expecting a little one of their own. People were shocked, but it was impossible not to be happy, not with little Jason Washburne enchanting the crew so thoroughly.

The little boy was a delight, and even Mal couldn't resist his bright blue eyes and adorable curls for very long. If he tended to babysit the boy long past his allotted time, if occasionally Zoe or Wash had to come to beg their baby back, nobody could say they minded. Not only was he utterly delighted by every little thing his godson did (including some things that would have made others wrinkle their noses), he also wanted as much practice as possible.

With Jayne now joining the ranks of soon to be fatherhood, Mal had expected the big man to go into a panic of his own. After all, River was only a month behind Inara according to Simon, and even though she seemed to be bypassing the more irritating aspects of pregnancy (he hadn't seen her get remotely nauseous or moody, a fact he refused to point out to Inara), the gestation was still taking its toll.

Whereas Inara's figure gained a stunning fullness to it (another on his list of things to say _very_ delicately to her), River didn't seem to be gaining any weight. Simon checked her regularly, but even now at eight months along she still only had a swelling to her stomach, nothing else to indicate she was with child. From behind she looked exactly like she always had, and her penchant for stealing Jayne's massive green jacket meant that unless she stood to the side, and a body knew what they were looking for, it was impossible to tell.

In fact, the ease with which her pregnancy had progressed had been an occasional source of irritation for Inara, who could be sent running to the bathroom by the most neutral of smells. Her breasts ached, her back was sore, and had she been any less of a lady she would have sworn at the sight of her larger figure. Still Simon assured her she was progressing perfectly, and it was hard to hold anything against the younger girl when she'd had such a hard life already.

Mal would fret over every bout of nausea, though she couldn't exactly complain about his attention, since she was often able to cajole him into rubbing her aching back. Plus, the larger chest was certainly helping her confidence, since he couldn't seem to look away from it. River's own lack of weight gain was a body wide affair, although it didn't seem to bother her husband a bit. Jayne could be found at each dinner with one arm thrown over the back of her chair, or a hand resting on her stomach. Inara had honestly thought he would have been fretting or terrified of his upcoming responsibilities.

But rather than enter full blown panic about his impending fatherhood, Jayne seemed only to show concern and protectiveness for his little wife. He was happy when Mal had told River she couldn't go on jobs, but refused to engage in the bluster or attempts to learn nappy changing.

Mal had grown irritated, very much looking forward to having another man to freak out with, and had one day marched into the dining room while his mercenary sat at the table with his wife sitting on the table top, passing his various gun parts.

"A'right, you try. Go on, he needs changin', you do it. It'll be yer young'un soon enough, you see what it's like." He'd thrust Jason at the big man, and had to admit his own infuriation at the calmness in his eyes. He had simply taken the baby boy, who was giggling and completely ruining Mal's bravado, and set him down, taking the supplies from Mal's arm.

Quick as a flash he was out of his dirty diaper, wiped, powdered, and re-diapered. Military gorram precision, the little boy giggling the whole time. He looked up at his Captain, smirking at the annoyance on the man's face. He'd lifted an eyebrow, glancing at his wife who was now leaning over and tickling Jason's little toes.

"Eight younger brother's Mal. You reckon I don't know how ta look after babies?" His smirk had deepened when Mal huffed with irritation, the look of annoyance ruined when Jason lifted one chubby little arm and pulled on his ear.

"Well how the hell am I 'sposed ta do this then?" Jayne had simply shrugged at him. "They're stronger than you think Mal, just keep practicin' with Jay and you'll be fine." And with that he returned to his task, smiling to himself while River hummed happily at Jason.

"Practice makes perfect, makes perfect again and again." Mal sighed. "Little witch, I ain't never been no one's Pa before, I don't know what I'm doing."

She met his eyes with that expression she usually saved for her brother, and occasionally her husband, when they were being particularly dense.

"He's been her Daddy for a long time now, Kaylee's even longer. He will learn to handle the little one." And with one final kiss of Jason's ticklish little toes, she turned back to her husband, effectively ending the conversation.

He sighed as he left. Inara was two gorram weeks overdue, and getting a mite testy. River was due in another month or so, and the worry about having that many damn babies on board was growing. Didn't help him none that Kaylee was walking around with a little smile on her face that he had a feeling he knew the origin of. He was going to have to kill the doc. Plus, tomorrow was Mother's Day, and Kaylee had told him on no uncertain terms that Zoe was to be made a fuss of, much to his first mate's consternation.

Of course, if he had known what would happen tomorrow he probably would have been a tad more panicked.

Inara woke with a start, the aching in her stomach intensifying, and she knew that it was time. She nudged her sleeping partner, struggling to hold in her painful moans.

"Mal, Mal it's time. Please Mal, wake up." He turned sleepily.

"It's time? What's time?" His eyes widened at the sight of her pained face, and he was standing and helping her out of bed in no time. He supported her as they left the shuttle, murmuring comforting words and trying not to show his own panic. He slammed an alarm on the wall that led directly to the doc's room, and continued on his way.

As they rounded the corner to the infirmary he almost bumped into Jayne, who was carrying his own girl in his arms, clad in nothing but his boxers.

"Jayne, what'd I tell you bout runnin' round the ship nekkid?" The mercenary raised an eyebrow and looked down at Mal's own unclothed form, and then shrugged.

"Girl reckons it's time, figured you'd make an exception." Mal's eyes bugged out.

"What? It can't be time fer that, she ain't due fer another month, and 'Nara's just started!" His voice was boarding on hysterical, and the woman in question gritted her teeth. "You can argue about this later Mal just get me to the rutting infirmary!" He sprung back into action, Jayne letting them go through first, which wasn't surprising since River looked calm and relaxed in her husband's arms, whereas Inara looked ready to kill someone.

The doc was already in the infirmary, calmly setting up two beds. He had his doctor face on, having obviously already been alerted by Jayne, and seemed to have reached his happy place in light of all the panic.

Mal helped Inara on to her bed, Jayne laying River on the other. The younger girl turned to the former Companion, a serene smile on her face. "Happy Mother's Day Inara." To Mal's amazement Inara had laughed, smiling back at the other girl. "Seems to me you've got this under control better than I do _mei mei_."

Simon cleared his throat. "Actually, it's the one thing the Alliance did right by her. Something about not wanting to worry about lack of focus in the field. It seems this shouldn't be too hard for her so as long as I'm nearby and Zoe is attending to her, I can just focus on you."

Jayne was looking tense but calm as he stood with one hand wrapped around the back of River's neck, stroking the side of it with his thumb. The young woman in the bed looked very small wearing only her husband's massive t-shirt, her thin legs poking out underneath it.

Mal looked over at Inara. Her sleeping attire had for once not been a slinky nightgown (something he'd happily noted she'd kept up even with her swollen stomach), but one of Mal's own red shirts, one that was too big even for him, but soft and comfortable with years of washing. Her face was flushed. Her hair was tousled and messy. She wasn't wearing a lick of make up. And she was about to give birth to his child. He didn't think she'd ever looked more beautiful.

He stroked her hair gently, his own cool hand obviously refreshing to his hot and sweaty partner. She looked up at him and he grinned. "I'm so damn lucky." She managed a tight smile, her eyes warm but pained. "The one time you manage to say the right thing," she trailed off, groaning as a contraction ripped through her.

Safa Serra Reynolds was born at 0530 on Mother's Day morning. Twenty minutes later Rayne Vera Cobb joined the world, and the girls could have been twins. Thick dark hair covered both of their heads, bright brown eyes and long dark lashes making them true beauties. Safa was a little bigger, a little darker in colouring than the tiny, ivory Rayne. Warm honey and pale milk.

But both had those huge dark eyes with their long dark lashes, both girls taking after their mothers. Jayne and Mal looked at their beautiful partners, both fast asleep after their efforts. Each looked down at the tiny little girl in his arms, and then at each other. Mal spoke first.

"Had ta be a girl, you got any idea how much trouble we're gonna be in when the hit puberty?" Jayne gulped, suddenly not as confident as he had been, and nodded at Mal, before straightening up and calming himself.

"Naw, ain't no problem. We'll jus' toughen them up early." His bravado was short lived when his tiny daughter reached up a hand and gently rested it on his bulky arm. He grinned widely, as entranced by his little girl as he was by the woman who birthed her. Safa gave her own Pa the same treatment, although he noted wryly that her little hand gripped the hair on his arm and pulled a little. Still, he would happily be her plaything for the rest of her life.

Both men left their wives sleeping, settling themselves down on the lounge outside on the infirmary. The last few hours were catching up with them, and when Zoe and Wash came in later, each holding one of Jason's little arms as they swung him between them, they smiled at the sight of the two sleeping men with tiny girls pressed into their chests.

Book met them in the hallway, sitting down by the men and taking Jason from his parents, settling the happy little boy on his lap. He couldn't exactly talk yet, but he was making noises, and Book liked to think that the "babababa" he was now happily burbling was just for him.

Zoe and Wash entered the infirmary, where Inara and River were both now awake, looking at their men sleeping with their daughter's. River smiled. "Happy Mother's Day Zoe." The warrior woman nodded. "And to you, little one, and you, Inara." Inara smiled as sleep began to overtake her once more.

It was two days before Simon let either of them leave the infirmary, with River the most eager to exit the white room. He grinned as his sister slipped off slowly to find her husband and their little girl, knowing the big man was currently stretched out on the couch of the galley, his daughter held tightly to his chest as he read to her.

Both Mal and Jayne were completely smitten with their tiny girls, and Inara often had to fight her partner for time with her baby. It was often that they could be found on the bridge, both seated on the floor with their little Safa charming them both.

Jayne was at his most amusing whenever the crew was allowed off ship. Whereas in the past he would be the first one gone and last one back, he now would hesitate, wanting to stay where it was safe for his girls. Still, one bat of River's long lashes was usually enough to convince him to come out with her. And if that didn't work, her roundhouse was just as lethal as it had ever been. In fact, only two weeks after having Rayne she was back to her usual size, tiny and toned, and Inara would have been annoyed except she didn't mind her newfound curves. Plus it was driving Mal crazy to see all that extra flesh (particularly in the chest area) and know he wasn't allowed to do anything until she was fully healed.

So when Jayne could finally be convinced to leave the ship, it was with a full arsenal, always including Vera strapped across his back, and at least four other firearms, three knives and a couple of grenades, not to mention the extra bandoleers of ammunition. He would have made a right terrifying sight, all that firepower, all that hard muscles, all his six foot four inches and fierce eyes.

Except he always had an arm around a pale slip of a girl who was carrying their tiny daughter, and he would regularly stop in the street just to hear her happy burbling, or kiss his pretty wife. Still, nobody thought it in their best interests to mess with a man so heavily armed with so much to protect.

Jason, no longer the only baby on the ship, was charmingly delighted by the new additions, and could regularly be found toddling after his Mama to see the "piddy gurls" as he called them. Safa would giggle at him and pull at his hair, but it was obviously to any onlooker that he had eyes only for the quiet, calm Rayne. Jayne had taken one look at the tiny boy's entranced face and made a note to speak to Wash as soon as possible.

Mal didn't know where he'd got the fool idea that the new mother's aboard his ship would need protecting, but it only took one drunken fool to grab River's arm before that opinion was corrected. They'd been out on Persephone, enjoying the sunshine, and he and Jayne had ducked into a cigar store. Inara, Zoe, River and Kaylee were out with the little ones, Wash, Simon and Book were in a bookshop nearby.

Some toothless idiot had drunkenly grabbed River's arm as he and Jayne had been exiting the store, but before either could draw a weapon she had simply spun, Rayne held tightly to her chest, and kicked out her foot like a switch blade. He'd gone flying, and several of his pals nearby had taken exception to that.

Until they'd seen Zoe's Mare's Leg being pointed between their eyes, seen River return to battle stance, and seen Inara produce a shining stiletto from the folds of her robes. Even Kaylee, now swollen with her own little one, had glared at them fiercely, the three little ones quickly put behind their parents, or their carry pouches swung to their Mama's backs, and a protective circle was formed around their most vulnerable members, including the pregnant mechanic.

Jayne and Mal had stood dumbstruck as they'd stared at their fearsome women. Zoe had arched an eyebrow.

"You sure you wanna be doin' that?" The four men looked to their fallen comrade, and quickly decided that there was no power on earth to make them challenge those terrifying women. They had scattered.

Later, Mal wondered when he'd gotten stupid enough to think for a second that the women on his ship weren't ten times scarier than the men. He'd asked Wash, Simon, Jayne and Book, and been met largely with laughter.

His daughter had just giggled and pulled his hair.

He thought it was probably a fairly accurate response.

**A/N:** Obviously we have exited our year on Serenity, and this story is slowly winding up. For anyone who recently read my Flight or Fight or Freeze Response series, I just felt like River needed to have it easy this time round! Please review!


	8. New Year's

**TITLE:** New Year

**DISCLAIMER:** Not mine.

**A/N:** The finale to this series. You're wonderful reviews have made this more than worthwhile, and I'm so glad so many people wanted more! Which is why…there shall be a sequel! I thought there were more moments that deserved to be spoken about :) For anybody wondering, Safa (Mal and Inara's daughter) means "Serenity" in Arabic.

**NEW YEAR**

It was just a few days after Christmas, the first Christmas celebrated with their little brood of new crewmates. New Year's Eve had never really been a big deal for the folks of Serenity, last year it had simply passed without any real recognition, although Mal had occasionally used it as an excuse for a drink or three.

But this year there was so much to celebrate that Christmas didn't seem to cover it all. As magical as the day had been, with the bright lights and twinkling tinsel enchanting the young ones, the crew had agreed with Kaylee that another day of celebration wouldn't hurt. Actually, with Kaylee now in her final few weeks of pregnancy and feeling every single second of it there wasn't much that the crew wouldn't agree with her on.

Simon was handling everything suspiciously well, although River had said something about surprises coming to break the calm. Still, it all seemed like a fine idea, and they'd set up to celebrate accordingly. There wasn't a grand feast – the new arrivals on the boat meant that not a single crew member was comfortable being on land too long, not with so many vulnerable to attack, and most of their foodstuffs worth feasting on had gone on Christmas Day.

Still, Inara and Book had worked hard with what they had left, and a fine stew and fresh salad were nothing to complain about. Luckily there had been plenty of alcohol left over from Christmas, so people were becoming comfortably merry. Rayne and Safa were completely unaware of what was going on, but both of their Daddies were singing loudly in funny voices, and that was quite enough for them.

Jason was now able to walk on his own, albeit not for long periods of time, and happily babbled to the rest of the crew about "da beepy bap bap"…not that anyone really knew what that meant. So far his repertoire included "Baba" (which delighted Wash no end), "Babababa" (which Book claimed was entirely meant for him), "Mama" (which made Zoe's eyes soften and a radiant smile appear on her face), and "piddy gurls" (which was meant entirely for the two little beauties he was currently dangling string in front of).

Inara made the executive decision to confiscate the rest of the whiskey from Jayne, Mal and Simon before things got any more out of hand. One more verse of "friggin in the riggin" and Zoe was going to shoot them all. Some things never changed.

River was looking at Kaylee, who seemed to be sweating a little more than usual, and was occasionally scrunching up her face. She poked Simon on the shoulder with a bony finger, rolling her eyes when her brother whined and then laughed manically.

"Time." Simon struggled to focus on his thin sister. His brain struggled to catch up with his mouth. "Time? Time?" Suddenly Kaylee's low moan of pain caught his attention. "TIME? Now? It's time!"

He sobered instantly, although the same couldn't be said for Jayne and Mal, who launched into some kind of made up song about it being time at the tops of their lungs, causing their daughters to burst into another flurry of giggles, which in turn delighted Jason.

Zoe and Inara both rolled their eyes, quickly helping Kaylee up. The only slightly inebriated doctor had immediately bolted to the infirmary, much to the consternation of the woman carrying his child. She gritted her teeth against the pain, drawing in a deep breath. "I'm gonna kill him."

Seeing sweet Kaylee all angry just made Jayne and Mal laugh harder, making Book shake his head as he followed Inara and Zoe, each supporting Kaylee's arms. River turned to her husband and Captain.

"You are both such boobs." She rose gracefully, moving towards the infirmary and scooping up both her daughter and Safa. Her dignified exit was only slightly marred by the insane giggling of the two idiots she left in the galley. Jason pulled on Mal's shirt.

"Tayle now." New words were usually a source of delight, but now Mal's eyes widened. Oh crap, were they gonna be in trouble. He nodded at Jason whilst pulling himself up unsteadily, one hand cracking out to smack the back of Jayne's head.

"Whaddya do that fer?" Mal looked pointedly around the now empty galley, and Jayne's eyes widened. "I reckon we're gonna be in a bit o' trouble later, Cap'n." Mal nodded, letting Jason pull both him and Jayne to the infirmary, where it looked like all hell had broken loose.

Simon, usually so composed in these situations, was running around like a madman while Wash laughed at him. Inara and Zoe were helping a furious Kaylee up into the infirmary bed, while River sat in the corner with her daughter held on her knee. Zoe had taken Safa and moved back a safe distance, convinced that this was when Kaylee would finally snap and kill someone.

Book was trying to calm down Simon, who couldn't seem to get his head on straight. Inara ran the ultrasound wand over Kaylee's stomach to see what was going on inside.

"Um, Simon?" Her cultured voice carried over the loud infirmary. "Were you aware that you're having twins?"

Simon's eyes bugged out of his head while Jayne and Mal dissolved once again into their mad giggling. He looked to his crewmates, trying to think of what he should do. In the end he chose to follow Jayne's example and do the most inappropriate thing possible given the situation.

He fainted.

When he woke up he had been sat on the couch, propped up between Jayne and Mal while Wash sat on the floor with Simon. His eyes immediately snapped to the infirmary where Kaylee's painful scream could be heard.

He stood up, pausing briefly as blood rushed painfully into his skull, and stumbled into the room. His beautiful Kaylee looked exhausted, but Inara nodded reassuringly at him, and Zoe was telling her to keep pushing. He stood sheepishly at her side.

"I'm so sorry bao bei, I didn't mean-"he was cut off as her hand gripped the front of his shirt tightly and pulled him down til he was face to face with her. "You put two gorram babies in me ya evil hundan." He couldn't help but grin at how funny the words sounded coming from her sweet face.

"Just relax bao bei, everything looks fine."

Kayne Derrial Tam was delivered first, blinking sunny eyes at the rest of the crew, followed almost immediately by Michael Simon Tam. Identical twins apparently ran in Kaylee's family, and as Simon gingerly held his two boys he couldn't believe his luck.

The rest of the crew had vacated the infirmary, although he knew they were lingering about. River had kissed his cheek as they left. "Good brother, good husband, now good father too. Very talented." He had smiled at her, looking to where his tired wife was staring at the twin boys in his arms.

"Thank you, bao bei. These are the best two presents anyone has ever given me." She smiled tiredly at him, eyes beginning to drop. "Happy New Year's Simon." And as she fell asleep Simon wondered what he could have possibly done to get so lucky.

New Year's Day was a quiet affair, people stopping in to see the new babies. Mal and Jayne both woke with punishing hangovers, the former also earning a tongue lashing from an irritated Inara. When he entered the galley with Safa and saw Jayne doing ammunitions inventory with Rayne on his lap, he sat down heavily across the table.

"So, how angry was River wit' ya this mornin'?" Jayne looked confused. "Why would she be angry?" Mal's mouth dropped open. "Cuz we were so hammered last night they needed to help us get ta bed? Cuz Kaylee went inta labour and we giggled?"

Jayne smirked at his Captain. "My wife's a ruttin' Reader Mal; you think she couldn't see what was gonna happen last night? She don't chew me out fer things she don't try ta stop from happenin'." Mal glared at the smug expression on his mercs face.

"Well that just plum ain't fair." Jayne's smirk deepened as he bounced Rayne on his knee. "Ain't no need ta be jealous Mal, jus' how it is." Mal was about to open his mouth to retort when the Reader in question strode elegantly into the room. She took Rayne from her husband and turned, nose in the air. Jayne looked confused.

"Baby, what'd I do?" River shot him a look that could freeze blood. "No bragging, teasing Captain is rude." And with that she strode out, their little girl waving happily at him over her Ma's thin shoulder. Mal was the one to smirk now, the evil look completely ruined by Safa's little face poking up from his lap. Jayne glared.

"Bite me."

That night people slowly converged into the infirmary, the decision to eat in the lounge outside unanimous. The family wanted to be together, wanted to welcome the newest arrivals. Plus Jayne and Mal had gotten into an argument that may have resulted in the galley table being tipped over.

Simon helped Kaylee into the wheelchair they had stored, moving her smoothly into the lounge area. River had forgiven Jayne and was currently speaking softly to her daughter while the big man laid an arm around her shoulders. Zoe and Wash were cuddled together on the couch, their son squished between his parents and playing with his Pa's dinosaurs as the pilot made funny voices and the warrior woman grinned.

Book was holding Safa who was looking up at him adoringly, she loved the Preacher man with his big deep voice. Mal had been relegated to the floor, back leaning against the couch, but didn't seem to mind. Probably had something to do with Inara sitting between his legs, his arms wrapped around her waist. Kaylee smiled up at her husband, Michael held in his arms, Kayne sleeping in her own.

Simon thought about Miranda, about how hard it had been afterwards, about the struggle just to make it through the day. He thought about that very first occasion that Kaylee had decided on, a Halloween party. He thought about what could have happened if she wasn't the ray of sunshine that she was, if she hadn't seen something needing to be done and forced them all to do it.

They still argued, still disagreed. Nine people living on a boat together, along with five children, would rarely agree on everything. They would bicker, fight, and annoy one another. The wouldn't always get along. Family rarely does.

He thought about his sister with her massive husband and tiny daughter. He thought about Wash and Zoe, nearly losing so much and now happier than ever. He thought about Book, comfortably slipping into the role of Grandpa despite his maintenance that he "never married". He thought about Inara and Mal, still so stubborn and infuriating but loving each other none the less. He thought about his wife, tired but just as happy as ever.

He knelt down next to her and kissed her cheek.

"Thank you, Kaylee." The rest of the crew turned to them and nodded in her direction. They all knew how important she'd been, how much they could have lost if not for her ingenuity. Not a person sitting there wasn't grateful, wasn't thankful for what she had done for them. She had given them all hope, courage and joy. Because of her they weren't just a crew, they were a family.

For once every family member agreed on something wholly and completely.

And Simon thought that was quite an occasion.

**THE END**

**A/N:** Ok, so the final line was something straight out of an after school special, but I figure Simon is sometimes a little corny! Keep a look out for the sequel to this series, which I would love title suggestions for! "More Occasions" just sounds ridiculous…

Please review! Until next time, Browncoats.

The Frisky Firelily


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